A Guide to Gnomish

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Some peoples has bin complainin at us gnomies dat dems dunna unnerstant what we’s sayin so fer all yoos Big Peoples who’s confuseded! ere’s a guide ta some commin words an whattems means an howwa say stuff like a proper gnomie :)

Contents

Basic Grammar

Never use two words wher one'll do
Example:-
wrong way >> It is hot today
gnomish way >> Is hot taday
Never use stoopid silly-ables in a word
Example:-
wrong way >> Everything is going wrong
gnomish way >> Evvythin is goin wrong
Never add ‘ing’ to wordses cuz Gnomish dunna use the ‘g' cuz we's 'Nomes' not 'G-Nomes'
Example:-
wrong way >> It is raining again
gnomish way >> Is rainin again
‘'ed'’ an ‘'es'’ can be added a random nummer of times to add emphysis
Example:-
gnomish way >> I killededed lotsa mermenses
Allus ‘'an'’ never ‘'and'’
Example:-
wrong way >> cats and wolves
gnomish way >> kitties an wulufs
Allus ‘'na’' never ‘'not'’
Example:-
wrong way >> I don’t think it is
gnomish way >> I dunna think it be
If yoos dunna know how to spell it mek it up til it sounts right
Example:-
wrong way >> Supercalifragilisticespialidocious
gnomish way >> Soupie-callie-frajie-listie-kexpie-allie-doh-shis
Them things what yous call peoples by is allus plural
Example:-
wrong way >> You, He, She, Them, We
gnomish way >> Yous, Hims, Hers, Dems, We’s
Dunt add letters fer no reason
Example:-
wrong way >> There are a number of them
gnomish way >> Is a nummer of theys
Emote stuffs
Example:-
wrong way >> Yes
gnomish way >> *Taraiha nods* Is true
Dunna be afraida use verra long sentinsis cuz gnomies dunna needa breath verra offin which is why wes dunna use punk-shoo-ay-shin an juss kips goin til we's run outta fings ta say which can sometimes be ages an ages an I finks mebbe dis why Big Peoples dunna unnerstant gnomies all da time cuz dems needa stop fer breath an dat intyrupts da flow o da words an da meanin ovv ems but yous can use full-stops atta ends o sentinsis but ony if yous really means em
end gnome logic
Example:-
wrong way >> Usin punk-shoo-ay-shin
gnomish way >> Ignorin it
'!' is not puk-shoo-ay-shin
Example:-
wrong way >> Usin '!' to end a sen-tense
gnomish way >> Usin '!' to emphy-size wordses an stuffs an Is equivvilent to -^ an ^^ an :O

Basic Word & Phrases

BOO!!!/lo 
Traditional greeting meaning ‘Hi’
Mista (name)/Missus (name) 
Traditional title for anyone not-gnomie
(name) gnomie 
Traditional title for other gnomes/halflings
How yous bin? 
How have you been?
Yous verra clever 
You are very clever
We’s Gnomies 
We are gnomes/halflings
Der’s lotsa dems 
There are lots of them
I’s a sneakie 
I am a scout who likes to lurk a lot
I’s bin sneakerisin 
I’ve been in stealth mode/afk
I’s sad 
I’m not feeling very happy and chipper right now
Hims gotsa go/goned sneakerisin
He’s going/gone afk/into stealth mode
Yous bestest Elfie evva 
You are a lovely person despite being a sissy elfie
Bringit!
Come on then if you think you're hard enough but you're not
Pennieses
Anything of monetary value
Allus 
Always
Shinies 
Trinkets, jewellery, collectibles etc, whether of value or not
Box o shiny 
Little box where gnomes/halflings keep their shinies. All gnomes/halflings carry these or have one sneakerised away somewhere
Bootses 
Verra Verra Important item of apparel. Any colour, but allus shiny
Is what yous thinks 
You and who's army?
Dunna start 
Stop it/shut up or I'll bite your ankles
Big Person 
Anyone not gnomish/halfling i.e. not cute (Exceptions can be made for Ratonga on account of the fur)
Gimme! 
I would like to see/investigate/use/eat that item please

Note: 'please' is implied in the concept of 'Gimme'. If not bein polite, then correct word is 'Givit!'

Race Translations

Note: Descriptions may be added to help differentiate. e.g. Majik-Persin = Mage

The Gnomish Attitude & How To Use It

  1. Gnomies is allus right
  2. All Gnomies is speshul
  3. Gnomies is ony cute peoples cept dems who's wearin Wuluf hats cuz dems cute but dems still not gnomish unless dem is end gnome logic
  4. Gnomies an Halflings is da same fing
  5. Allus try Plan A first
    1. Plan A = stant wit hants on hips an scowl menny-sinly
  6. If Plan A not workin go to Plan B
    1. Plan B = grab summit pointy an wave it about menny-sinly
  7. There is no Plan C - Plan A an Plan B allus works
  8. If Plan A an Plan B dunna work use sprint or sneakerise or find a Big Person to stant ahint
  9. Allus use */end gnome logic* to innicate ta da Big Person yous done esplainin summit dems dunna get anyways

Dass howwa spik gnomish an unnerstant gnomish an be gnomish.

Is easy really.

wunners why peoples dunnit gettit

Credits

written by Taraiha Kitty'Gnome for Truewatch Library

Retrieved from "http://www.truewatchguild.co.uk/wiki/A_Guide_to_Gnomish"
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